2/23/10

" Even the demons......"

Ian Lyons :) the day before he turned 13
and 9 months before he saw the glory of God.


James 2:19 " You believe that there is a God. Good! Even the demons believe that and shudder." Ok! So this is where Im at. Crown season. But this season is different. I am playing the role of a demon as always but this year seems harder. Maybe its because of school, maybe its because of all the additional scenes.... but this year is harder. That verse up there. THATS EXACTELY HOW I FEEL LIKE! Im believing God is taking control of this production and then again, im shuddering. Im tired and my legs HURT. really really hurt. I dont like egging on people to "CRUCIFY HIM!" I really really dont like it. I HATE it. I dont like acting demonic while the song " He loves us" is playing. But Its easy to get into this character for me and its something kids need to see and hate. So ya this isnt just me complaining that my fighting partner ( zac smith) and I dont have our fight down, my hip popped out of place tonight, and my legs feel like jello.... no i have a point. The point is can we become exhausted for God in tiny practical ways like this?...............................Can we glorfiy him through petty pain and aches? Why not?


I have something else on my mind. IAN. One of my close friends, and he died in April of cancer. my 13 year old friend ( one day younger than i) died from caner. I just dont get how MY friend could...... die. I just dont even understand it. I had a dream last night about him. He was back, as if he never died but simply left somewhere and all this time i have been waiting for him to come back so i can tell him all that he has missed. He was really really cute in my dream and I hugged him and exclaimed about how much he had missed while he was "gone". He just laughed and said " r u kidding me? YOU have missed everything! Its a party up there!" I didnt like that, because i suddenly remembered that he had DIED and was now back. I woke up and was sure Ian was back, it was only until I started getting ready for school that I remembered. Trying to strech out of my Colorado, TCA, bubble these reality moments come and go at free will. Its just something that I have been thinking about today. Goodnight Everyone :)

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